My daughter told me that she loved being a sister. Yes, she said this with enthusiasm! I totally believe her because she absolutely adores her brother. Although, she wanted a sister in the beginning she adjusted to her brother extremely well. I can honestly say despite their age different they are the best of friends. Here are some things I did to help their bond grow naturally so far…
- Don’t FORCE it– Let the bond grown naturally and uniquely. They will have their own unique relationship and they don’t need you to try to force it upon them. Stop trying to force them to cuddle or spend time together. They will bond when the time is right!
- Be Upfront– Let the older sibling know what will and will not change. I always remind my daughter that my love for her has not diminished because I have another child now. I did let he know that I will have to divide my time, but there is enough mommy to go around for everyone.
- Alone time– I find time for each child by themselves. For example, when LJ has “boy time” with dad I spend time with just my Heaven. During this time we do something that she wants, we eat what she likes and focus all our time on her needs and wants. Having multiple children incorporates a lot of sharing, so alone time gives them a chance to not have to share.
- Emphasize the benefits of being the BIG one– I let my daughter know how important her role as the Big sister is. She is the “Head Honcho”. I let her know that her brother is watching everything she does and is inspired by her. I have also made her feel even more special by increasing her Chores and allowance!
- Ask Advice- it’s important to get feedback from your child. Ask them how things are going and how they are feeling. Open communication helps everyone. It is very important to make sure that your children are content and they know that you care. Change is not always easy but it is necessary in life. Once your kids realize that you are making a huge effort to include them in your decisions the transition will be a lot easier.