A mom friend and I had a discussion about moms vs the workplace…

We both agreed that we realized how difficult working mom life can be once our children hit school age.  For many career moms, it appears to be more difficult when your child is an infant. First, there is the separation anxiety. At this point, you are faced with the many adjustments such as:

Selecting and surviving child care,

deciding on a nanny,

home-care of a daycare facility.

It is possible that you may find a little confidence when your children finally hit preschool. Unfortunately, with parenthood you realize that your routine is constantly changing especially when you get comfortable. LOL. They start school and you have to adjust again. Honestly, school brought on its fair share of challenges, as it relates to my career life.

Here is my perspective:

Well or should I say lemme (let me) break it down..

There is Summer break, Thanksgiving break, Christmas/Winter break, Spring break, random holidays off and of course our famous EARLY OUT DAYS.   The truth is many moms work in careers where the school hours are not conducive to the career mom schedule. Which means that we have to either find more flexible careers or save up plenty of PTO. We may even have to stay in constant communication with our employer. In layman’s terms, let them know what the hell is going on so that we can cover our ass and keep our job. Remember, we are not only required to be great moms, but to also still be considered a valuable worker.

I noticed once my daughter started school that 3 pm dismissal was not working for me.  For most moms the school hours are not flexible enough to drop off or pick up their children. If you can do one or the other your are lucky. So moms are trying to figure out transportation services, before and after care, bus routes, carpooling, etc. And again, the early out days. At this point, there is nothing left to do besides LEAVE WORK EARLY. Make sure you say it again and listen to those echoes behind.

It is not a sin; however, my friend and I also discussed our experiences with co-workers when they found out you had to leave early. Especially, if it had something to do with one of your children. I can say that the current company I work for is very family friendly. Yet, in the past, I have worked for corporations that were not as forgiving about leaving due to personal family issues.

I remember I had a situation myself when I was leaving work eight minutes earlier and one of my coworkers had the audacity to look at his watch and say is “your watch fast?”. He was joking, but I was not.  I wanted to say, ” Excuse me a$$hole, you come in work late every single day, your performance is mediocre at best and you have the audacity to check me!” I didn’t care if he was joking I was sick of people only acknowledging anything negative.

Not many people understand the stress and struggles of the working mom. The constant need to balance being a great mom and a great employee is challenging. Plus, I never heard anyone joke about the days I was there extra early, or the nights I worked from home after hours, or the weekends I was putting in.  Or the days I hauled ass into work after being up late when a crying baby, or a sick child with a fever. Or how about beating it into work after running back to the school to give my child a backpack or lunch they forgot. So please, a few minutes early out should never be a major concern or to be put on spotlight.

Sadly, that is just some of the discrimination that career moms deal with on the day to day basis. Despite it, we still keep moving and do our best to debunk any theories that we are less than the average worker. We strive to prove that we are more efficient and proficient than our counterparts. It is just a shame we still have to do way more than we need to prove ourselves. When in my case, the numbers don’t lie.

 

Tahnee Cole