“If you leave that damn coat at school, don’t come home!”

Hey, I’m a black mom and I’m extra AF (as f*ck), if you aren’t familiar with the acronym. LOL

Excuse my French, but there is no better way to describe my parenting style when it comes to trying to prove a point to my kids.

When my kids leave the house during the Fall and Winter season, I find myself giving them a lecture. Not only about making sure they keep on their coats, but keeping up with their coats. Hats, scarves and gloves as well.

My mama said it to me and I am pretty sure my grandma said it to her.

“If you leave the coat at school, don’t come home.”

For some reason, my kids need me to take it to the extreme to prove to them that I am not playing with them and ….

Ain’t nobody got time for that!

They not only need their coats to stay warm and avoid getting sick. But mama pays good money to keep them warm and I want to see them look like they left the house.

The coats are usually not a huge issue, because they don’t want to freeze those little honey buns off. However, I feel like I replace gloves all winter.  So far the old stick the gloves in the hat and hat in the sleeve trick is working.

If not, I hope the school has some bunk beds, because I mean what I said before.

LOL

jr coat

From A Mom, trying to keep her kids warm

XOXO

Tahnee Cole

Surviving the Village…

Every mom and dad needs a Village.

They say it takes a village to raise a child.

There will come a point when you can no longer do everything yourself.

Your advice will no longer be enough.

You will need someone to pick up the kids when you are unable to.

God forbid you fall ill and need an extra shoulder to lean on.

The truth is, you will need help at some point during your parenthood journey.

 Yet, can you survive and embrace the Village? Do you have the ability to simply put your pride aside? Can you accept your Village in their rawness?

This will be the real them. The flawed them. The village that will not always have the same thought process as you. However, they are still a Village, your Village.

They each will have a unique perspective on how to raise the kids. A unique relationship with your child. The parent that you co-parent with might not always agree with your decisions. Will this make you crumble, shutdown and force yourself to take on all the challenges alone?  Will you throw a tantrum like a child or are you willing to hear them out? Can you come to an agreement, agree to disagree?

What about co-existing with your nagging mother in law (who is obviously going to be a part of your village)? Or will you shut her out because she is becoming overbearing and opinionated?

 As I get older, I am realizing that a Village who is likeminded makes me feel more comfortable. However, that is not always a guarantee. In a perfect world, we would like everyone to do what we say, when we say, but that is not reality. So we have to accept that the people in our village will contribute something different to our kids lives. I am almost positive that different opinions will benefit one day, because lets face it, we are not always correct.

So, personally I have to allow myself to gain the maturity and wisdom to allow help and strengthen my Village without being judgemental and stubborn.

So the next time you are shutting a family member out, because they disagree with you. Take a moment and try to consider their perspective.

Think about this, are you pushing away your Village? Or are you trying to build your Village stronger?

Can you survive your Village?

From A Mom who is trying to build and not burn her village down!

Tahnee Cole

BUSINESS PROFESSIONAL STYLED MAMA?

So I was speaking to a mom the other day, a new mom who has never worked in an office.  She worked in retail and recently at a hair care supply store. She asked me exactly what Business Professional was…

I gave her the side eye…    Screenshot_2018-01-02-11-58-44-1

Well only because I had never met anyone who NEVER had a job that required them to wear Business Professional. Unless of course, it was one of my nurse buddies who dresses in uniform. I mean think about my blog Black Pumps… The ideal shoes for a Corporate Professional Woman is a pair of black pumps. However, there is a first time for everything. Since all of my career has been working in a business professional attire environment; it is my duty to enlighten this Career Mama!

Business Professional is the epitome of DRESS FOR SUCCESS. This professional style represents the company well for presentations, gaining new clients and for landing huge opportunities. It provides a polished and no-nonsense look that yells out, “She’s a Working Woman. She’s a Professional. She is a Boss B….”

 

Ok, I am sure you got the point! thQQ7HRPT0

I especially wanted to talk about this on my blog, because I know a lot of MOMS who blame mommy life on not having enough time to look put together. However, if you want to attract a career with a Business Professional Look listen up:

THE LOOK IS…

A skirt suit or pant suit in colors: Black, Brown, Gray, or Navy are always acceptable. The pants should be full length ( not Capri or Crop styled). Skirts should always hit the knee. Please let go of the Club skirts. We are going for a professional look, not out on a date with your man. A nice conservative shirt or silk blouse will always compliment the suit,  but please BEWARE of shirts that show too much cleavage or are transparent.

FIX IT UP WITH…

When it comes to accessorizing the look, keep the jewelry and makeup down to a minimum. We want our makeup to look polished, but not overdone. Simple earrings like stud diamonds and pearls always create a high class business woman look. Hoisery is a must and shoes should be closed toe. Also, watch for the shoes with the heels that are way too high!  Now honestly, the shoe part is a problem for me, because I love my four to six inch pumps. However, keep in mind you will be in those shoes all day. So find a heel that is comfortable for you.

HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT THIS…

This is just a general standard from my experience working in Corporate America and general research from various companies. Every company will have their personal set of dress code guidelines. I know many people who complain and say this dress code is cruel to mankind, but honestly it is pretty standard in most Corporate Businesses. If you do not like Business Professional it is best to seek employment with a more relaxed dress code. If you enjoy this type of dress then mix and match different looks.  Plus keep up to date on how to add the latest fashion into your professional look!

Are you apart of the Business Professional Clan?